1- Rumination

When we nurse and rehearse the hurt, this reinforces the negative experience and burns the event deeper into our mental neuropathways. Our brains are designed to only be able to effectively think one thought at a time… therefore when we are fixated on the hurt, we are not able to focus on the other good and important things that are nice, needed, and necessary.

Philippians 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.

 

2- Diminished Memory

When we remain stressed for long periods of time or we refuse to forgive, cortisol causes our brain to atrophy, especially our memory center called the hippocampus. We must be selective to be effective in our mental focus.

Isaiah 46:9 Remember the former things of old, For I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is none like Me,

 

3- Amplified Negative Emotions

Prolonged stress also amplifies our amygdalae’s sensitivity making us even more susceptible to further hurt and pain. We often don’t see life as it is but as we are. When we are looking for things to upset us, disappoint us, and bother us…. We will find it.

2 Corinthians 10:4-5 For the weapons of our warfare are not ^[a]carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, ⁵ casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ,

 

4- Misguided Desire

Unforgiveness can cause us to begin to sense joy, happiness, and pleasure when we see those who have hurt us experience misfortune themselves. It causes our brain to produce the chemical dopamine. It begins to feel good to see bad things happen to those we have not forgiven for their wrongs. This is the way the world functions, but God has called us to a much higher standard.

Matthew 5:43-48 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ ⁴⁴But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, ⁴⁵ that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. ⁴⁶ For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? ⁴⁷ And if you greet your brethren only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the ^[c]tax collectors do so? ⁴⁸ Therefore you shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect.

 

Here are some ways to overcome unforgiveness:

 

1- Admit the Pain

When we name a painful emotion, we decrease that negative emotion’s intensity. We are only as sick as our secrets. We must remember that denial (dee-Nile) is more than just a river in Egypt. Talk to a safe friend, pastor, counselor etc. When we want forgiveness, we must confess to God but when we want freedom we must confess to another person, who cares for us.

2 Corinthians 13:5 Examine yourselves as to whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Do you not know yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?—unless indeed you ^]are disqualified.

James 5:16 Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, ^[b]fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.

 

2- Journal

Processing our pain through writing it down lessens the pain and helps us gain better perspective. Our chaotic thoughts detangle over our lips (talking) and fingertips (writing). Through journaling, seek to gain God’s perspective and healing.

Jeremiah 30:2 “Thus speaks the Lord God of Israel, saying: ‘Write in a book for yourself all the words that I have spoken to you.

 

3- Choose to Forgive

Forgiveness is a decision and a process. Some offenses can be quickly and easily forgiven while the deeper the pain, the longer it takes. It is not so much forgiving and forgetting. Rather, true forgiveness is more like remembering it less and less over time. When the painful memory is no longer in control of you, but you are in control of it, you are practicing Biblical forgiveness.

Colossians 3:12-13 Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; ¹³ bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do.

 

4- Depend on God’s Grace

At the root of the Christian faith is grace. Receiving and extending God’s grace is foundational to Christianity. Grace is God’s Riches at Christ’s Expense. Because we have experienced the underserved grace of God in our lives, we are able to extend undeserved grace to others.

Ephesians 4:32 And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.

If this blog post has grabbed your curiosity and you would like to know more, please pursue any/all of the below options:

1-              Contact me at pastor@missionchurchlex.org

2-              Check out our church website Misisonchurchlex.org

3-              Visit us for Community Celebration and Worship every Sunday at 9am and 11am (Facebook livestreaming available at 9am) and Mission Groups                   each Wednesday at 630pm. We are located at 3288 Beaver Creek Drive Lexington KY 40515.

4-              Follow us on Facebook www.facebook.com/missionchurch.lex

5-              Continue to read this weekly blog- “Find your Why with Pastor D”

1. Contact me at pastor@missionchurchlex.org
2. Check out our church website www.misisonchurchlex.org
3. Visit us for Community Celebration and Worship every Sunday at 9am and 11am (Facebook livestreaming available at 9am) and        Mission Groups each Wednesday at 630pm. We are located at 3288 Beaver Creek Drive Lexington KY 40515.
4. Follow us on Facebook www.facebook.com/missionchurch.lex
5. Continue to read this weekly blog- “Find your Why with Pastor D”

Hello TMC Family and Friends,

During the month of July 2023 we received deacon nominations from the congregation. After the Board of Elders prayerfully and carefully evaluated the nominations, we are happy to report that we have two strong deacon candidates and one yokefellow candidate (deacon in preparation) that we believe God has provided to serve The Mission Church of Lexington! These three men are now being trained to serve in this important Biblical office. If once the deacon training is finished and the deacon candidates as well as the Board of Elders believe the Lord is still leading in this matter, these three men will be presented to the church during the “Information and Celebration Gathering” on December 3^rd for church affirmation. The newly established Board of Deacons will begin their tenure in January 2024. Over the next 6 weeks I will be sharing with you through this blog the sessions that I am using to train and equip our deacons so they can be the deacons they want to be and so they can be the deacons that TMC needs them to be! I believe the information in these sessions have spiritual and practical benefit to every Christian and every covenant church member.

 

 Scenario Conversation Starter:

Greg is a deacon at Suburban Community Church, a church that relocated from the inner city five years ago. He is also a commercial contractor who enjoys a good reputation among Christians and non-Christians alike. He’s a natural go-to kind of guy who gets things done. Recently Greg was asked by the city council to serve as chairman of a volunteer committee to oversee the construction of a new city park, complete with athletic fields and playgrounds. It’s at least a 12-to-15-month project.

If you were Greg, how would you handle this situation?

If you were one of the deacon officers, how would you feel about asking him to head up the new ministry? What other options might be available for consideration?

 

In a day when the media is bombarding us on every front through gadgets we can hold in our hands, carry in our pockets, or attach to our ears, it is easy to lose sight of the life-changing effects of kingdom work and living. As a word of caution: regardless of what is going on in our world today- politics, wars, rising costs on every front- we must never underestimate the value of kingdom work. It is the most important business that has ever taken place or ever will take place on this earth. Therefore, a deacon’s personal walk with Christ should demonstrate his application of kingdom principles in the midst of whatever may be coming our way- good or bad.

 

When we think about a deacon’s walk, we are referring to two critical areas of his life: his conduct and his conversation. The Bible provides a clear picture in Acts 6 of a godly deacon’s walk in one of the seven men selected to serve the early church- Stephen. Stephen was serious about God’s business, and deacons today should be just as serious as he was.

Stephen certainly met all the qualifications for a deacon. The Scriptures singled him out from the other six men.

 

Acts 6:3-5 Therefore, brethren, seek out from among you seven men of good reputation, full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business; ⁴ but we will give ourselves continually to prayer and to the ministry of the word.” ⁵ And the saying pleased the whole multitude. And they chose Stephen, a man full of faith and the Holy Spirit, and Philip, Prochorus, Nicanor, Timon, Parmenas, and Nicolas, a proselyte from Antioch.

 

Stephen is best remembered as the first New Testament martyr, based on Acts 7:54-60, where the details of his death are recorded, including how he responded to those who killed him.

 

Acts 7:59-60 And they stoned Stephen as he was calling on God and saying, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.” ⁶⁰ Then he knelt down and cried out with a loud voice, “Lord, do not charge them with this sin.” And when he had said this, he fell asleep.

 

It takes a godly walk to respond like Stephen did. A deacon who desires to live as God wants him to live should follow this Biblical model. Stephen led an exemplary life which personified much of the New Testament Scripture. Stephens focus on the Lord Jesus indicated in the passage above is clarified well by the Apostle Paul.

 

Colossians 3:1-4 If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God. ² Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth. ³ For you died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. ⁴ When Christ who is our life appears, then you also will appear with Him in glory.

 

Three characteristics of Stephen’s life teach deacons how to walk in a way that fulfills the ministry for which they have been singled out.

 

Stephen’s Walk of Fullness

The early church was grateful that God had placed men in their midst whose walk with God was characterized as fullness. When the church “looked out among them” (Acts 6:3), they were looking for those whose reputations had been time-tested and proven. In prayerfully thinking through the situation, the apostles identified six specific character qualifications, and Stephen met all six.

 

1- Men Known to Be Honorable

Acts 6:3 Therefore, brethren, seek out from among you seven men of good reputation, full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business;

 

The church’s challenge is to choose those men who stand out because they have earned respect for the lives they live. Dependable men whom the people would be happy to follow are often the kind of men who will make good deacons. A deacon’s conduct and character ought to stand out in such a way that people both inside and outside the church count him as an honorable man. God raises up in every church such men, and it is the responsibility of the church to seek them out.

 

2- Men Who Would Serve with Others on a Team

Acts 6:3 Therefore, brethren, seek out from among you seven men of good reputation, full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business;

                                                                                                                   

Men on a team must be able to serve together, listen to others’ opinions, put the good of others first, etc. Someone said it well, “Teamwork simply stated is less me and more we”. Deacons who focus on the will of God and the good of the church do not insist on getting their way when decisions need to be made. Instead, a good deacon insists that church work worth doing is worth doing together.

 

3– Men Who Were of Good Reputation

Acts 6:3 Therefore, brethren, seek out from among you seven men of good reputation, full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business.

 

Honesty and trust both inside and outside the church form the foundation of a deacon’s reputation. Deacons handle delicate and sometimes confidential affairs of those whom they serve. Therefore, deacons must be men with an impeccable reputation. A good deacon believes his reputation is worth more than gold.

 

4- Men Filled With the Spirit of God

Acts 6:3 Therefore, brethren, seek out from among you seven men of good reputation, full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business.

 

A deacon should spend quality time alone with God reading the Bible, allowing God to mold his character; and seeking guidance, direction, cleansing and fresh grace to live each day. It is during this time with God that a deacon asks the Lord to fill him with the Holy Spirit, to clothe him with humility, to empower him for service, and to guard him from temptation. The first deacons were men who, upon examination by the church, were known to be men filled with the Holy Spirit. The church should expect no less today. Every man who serves as a deacon should be full of (controlled by) the Holy Spirit.

 

5- Men Who Were Wise and Competent

Acts 6:3 Therefore, brethren, seek out from among you seven men of good reputation, full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business.

 

One scientist quipped, “Science is organized knowledge. Wisdom is organized life”. A deacon with wisdom serves the church in a skillful, deliberate, and organized way. In Stephen’s day, a lack of skill would have only added to the murmuring of disgruntled church members. It is vital that we are wise in meeting the needs of the people appropriately. A wise deacon handle people and their needs with proper care, knowing that unrest and disharmony within the church quench God’s glory in the church.

 

6- Men Who Were Responsible and Diligent

Acts 6:3 Therefore, brethren, seek out from among you seven men of good reputation, full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business;

 

Being a deacon is not about status; it is about service. It is not a position to hold; it is a mission to do. A healthy, growing church cannot be built on spare time and pocket change. It requires commitment, spiritual sweat, and hard work. Our business is God’s business and God’s business is saving souls! Deacons are on the front line of servant leading the church to be effective and efficient in the Lord’s work.

 

Stephen’s Walk of Faithfulness

Stephen’s life was marked by fullness and faithfulness. Remember, it is recorded twice that Stephen was “full of faith” (Acts 6:5,8). He was faithful to the Gospel, faithful to his testimony, and faithful to the truth of Scripture. The Biblical record shows three ways faithfulness characterized Stephen’s walk.

 

1- He Was Faithful with God’s Ministry

Acts 6:8 And Stephen, full of faith and power, did great wonders and signs among the people.

 

Notice that the passage said he “did great wonders and signs”. If God has given us a ministry, then He expects us to do something with it. Stephen was faithful to carry out what God had given him and gifted him to do. Remember, deacons are given a work to do more than a position to fill.

 

1 Peter 4:10 As each one has received a gift, minister it to one another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.

 

2- He Was Faithful With the Gospel Message

Acts 6:10 And they were not able to resist the wisdom and the Spirit by which he spoke.

 

Stephen knew the Bible and was a great apologist- defender of the faith. Deacons are not required to be able to teach/preach as a pastor is, but he is to be sound in doctrine. A deacon should know what he believes and why he believes it. When a deacon is speaking on Biblical matters, he should be capable to defend and declare the truth.

 

1 Peter 3:15 But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts, and always be ready to give a defense to everyone who asks you a reason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and fear;

 

3- He Was Faithful With Good Motives

Acts 6:15 And all who sat in the council, looking steadfastly at him, saw his face as the face of an angel.

 

Stephen’s countenance glowed from the inside out. That is just the way it is, one’s inner life cannot remain hidden. Not only must a deacon’s heart be pure, but a deacon’s motive must be pure and undefiled as he serves the church that ordained him.

 

Matthew 5:16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.

 

Stephen’s Walk of Forgiveness

Stephen’s life was marked by fullness, faithfulness, and forgiveness. Stephen practiced the teachings of Jesus from the Sermon on the Mount about forgiveness.

 

Matthew 5:43-46 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ ⁴⁴ But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, ⁴⁵ that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. ⁴⁶ For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same?

 

Stephen also practiced the principle of overcoming evil with good of which the Apostle Paul wrote.

Romans 12:17-21 Repay no one evil for evil. Have^[a] regard for good things in the sight of all men. ¹⁸ If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. ¹⁹ Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord. ²⁰ Therefore “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; If he is thirsty, give him a drink; For in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head.” ²¹ Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

 

Stephen’s walk of forgiveness afforded him a standing ovation by the Lord.

Acts 7:55-60 But he, being full of the Holy Spirit, gazed into heaven and saw the glory of God, and Jesus standing at the right hand of God, ⁵⁶ and said, “Look! I see the heavens opened and the Son of Man standing at the right hand of God!” ⁵⁷ Then they cried out with a loud voice, stopped their ears, and ran at him with one accord; ⁵⁸ and they cast him out of the city and stoned him. And the witnesses laid down their clothes at the feet of a young man named Saul. ⁵⁹ And they stoned Stephen as he was calling on God and saying, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.” ⁶⁰ Then he knelt down and cried out with a loud voice, “Lord, do not charge them with this sin.” And when he had said this, he fell asleep.

 

What higher honor could there possibly be? In forgiveness, Stephen was just like Jesus.

Luke 23:34 Then Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.”

 

In summary, a deacon who is going to be all God wants him to be is a deacon like Stephen. His walk will be characterized by the fullness of the Holy Spirit, faithfulness in serving both God and the church, and forgiveness in his relationship with others.

Ephesians 4:32 And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.

 

Discussion Questions:

 

1- In your opinion, why is teamwork so important in deacon ministry?

2- What should be done with a deacon who refuses to serve or is unable to work well with others? Why do you give this answer?

3- We talk about “serving God with your whole heart.” What does this phrase suggest to you? With all the pressures and stresses of our culture today, do you think it is even possible for a deacon to serve with his “whole” heart? How does the phrase “we have to be selective to be effective” apply to ministry and deacon service.

 

If this blog post has grabbed your curiosity and you would like to know more please pursue any/all of the below options:

1-              Contact me at pastor@missionchurchlex.org

2-              Check out our church website Misisonchurchlex.org

3-              Visit us for Community Celebration and Worship every Sunday at 9am and 11am (Facebook livestreaming available at 9am) and Mission Groups                   Wednesday at 630pm. We are located at 3288 Beaver Creek Drive Lexington KY 40515.

4-              Follow us on Facebook www.facebook.com/missionchurch.lex

5-              Continue to read this weekly blog- “Find your Why with Pastor D”

Hello TMC Family and Friends!

during the month of July 2023, we received deacon nominations from the congregation. After the Board of Elders prayerfully and carefully evaluated the nominations, we are happy to report that we have two strong deacon candidates and one yokefellow candidate (deacon in preparation) that we believe God has provided to serve The Mission Church of Lexington! These three men are now being trained to serve in this important Biblical office. If once the deacon training is finished and the deacon candidates as well as the Board of Elders believe the Lord is still leading in this matter, these three men will be presented to the church during the “Information and Celebration Gathering” on December 3^rd for church affirmation. The newly established Board of Deacons will begin their tenure in January 2024. Over the next 6 weeks I will be sharing with you through this blog the sessions that I am using to train and equip our deacons so they can be the deacons they want to be and so they can be the deacons that TMC needs them to be! I believe the information in these sessions have spiritual and practical benefit to every Christian and every covenant church member.

 

Scenario Conversation Starter:

Harold and Betty have been long-time, faithful members of the church, but lately they have grown concerned with the direction the worship is taking: the music seems too loud; the songs are unfamiliar; and a growing number of young adults have been closing their eyes and lifting their hands during worship- even shouting occasionally. Plus, Harold and Betty get tired of standing so long during the music. “Why can’t we sit down every now and then?” they whisper to each other. While Harold is slowly adapting to the new worship style. Betty continues to think that church services should be quiet, reverent, and sacred. To her, people being expressive and energetic during the church worship service really bothers her. She thinks it’s downright distracting and just makes her feel uncomfortable. She doesn’t know if it will do any good, but she decides to talk to someone who has influence to let him know that she is not the only one who feels this way.

If Betty knew you were a deacon and sought you out to share her concerns with you, what would you tell her and how would you try to help her? As a deacon, what is your responsibility if or when a situation like this arises at The Mission Church of Lexington?

 

As much as I love to preach and teach the Word of God, I can assure you that without a regular schedule of public and private worship of the Lord Jesus Christ I would be totally ineffective as a pastor of this church and a preacher of the Gospel. I simply must worship. I cannot live and function without it. And neither can you!

 

“Worship” is a compound word that means to “give worth”. Worshipping God acknowledges that He is worthy of what we are giving. God demands, deserves, and desires our worship. The result of sincere worship is a yielded and obedient heart. The Bible has a lot to say about worship, and Jesus was specific in what he had to say about it.

 

John 4:23-24 But the hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth; for the Father is seeking such to worship Him. ²⁴ God is Spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth.

God is standing and knocking at the door of our heart, desiring not only to speak to us but also to spend time with us. As spiritual leaders, deacons have a need to worship God in spirit and in truth, and two aspects of worship must exist for a deacon to be faithful to the Word, to the church, and to prayer and praise.

 

1- A Deacon and His Private Worship

As spiritual leaders, our private time alone with God should be the top priority of every day. If a deacon is not having regular communion with the God he serves, how can he ever hope to fulfill his calling? Deacons cannot lead others where they have not been or are not willing to go themselves.

 

A deacon, therefore, must be a worshipper if he hopes to help others become worshippers. Personal time alone with God was Jesus’ habit. Habits are often thought of negatively, but habits can be positive. I call these holy habits. A deacon can have no better habit than beginning each day with the Lord.

 

Mark 1:35 Now in the morning, having risen a long while before daylight, He went out and departed to a solitary place; and there He prayed.

 

The times of corporate worship are only as good as the accumulation of the individual times of our private worship. Don’t just come to church to worship but bring your worship to church with you! Several aspects of private worship are: 

1. To be in conversation with God
2. To be in communion with God
3. To be consumed by God.

 

Private worship leads to personal purity. Purity in turn empowers public service. To be a deacon you want to be, you must realize that nothing ranks higher than personal purity. If you miss in the area of personal purity, everything else falls by the wayside.

 

2- A Deacon and His Public Worship

It just makes sense that a deacon should attend and participate in the events his church deems important. And what is more important than the worship services where the congregation gathers for music and praise, prayer, Bible preaching, collecting an offering, fellowship as a church body, and a time of personal decision and commitment. A deacon should be faithful in worship.

 

Deacons and pastors are the only church officers mentioned in the New Testament, and they share equal responsibility in promoting and attending church services. Since no group ever rises above its leadership, pastors and deacons should set the example for faithful attendance and participation. In so doing, they will be raising the standard for the rest of the church family to follow their example.

 

1 Corinthians 11:1 Imitate me, just as I also imitate Christ.

 

An important part of public worship is the giving of tithes and offerings, and a deacon should be faithful to this part of public worship. A man should not be considered for ordination or installation as a deacon if he does not contribute financial support to his own church. The faithfulness of a man in giving to the church he serves is one of the clearest indicators of his true attitude toward the church. How can a deacon serve a church when his heart is not in it? It will be very difficult for a pastor to lead church members to give faithfully when their deacons are not setting the example.

 

Matthew 6:21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

 

Prayer is another significant part of public worship, and a deacon must be faithful in prayer. Like private worship, a deacon must practice private prayer during the week if he is to be effective in his public prayers on Sunday. Because they share spiritual leadership in the church, deacons and pastors ought to be the most faithful prayer warriors in the church, praying for the needs of the people. One of the greatest blessings a deacon can bestow on his pastor is to pray with him and for him. Fellas, I need the prayer and you need the practice… so keep those prayers coming my way!

 

Deacons should also be sensitive to those who attend public worship services. God may use a deacon more while he is on his way to a service than when he is in his normal place of service. A deacon’s opportunities to serve can occur in the most unexpected places. Jesus said that the two greatest commandments are to love God and to love other people. We show our love to God during public worship services, but those services do not necessarily provide the opportunity to show love to others as much as other times of personal ministry. The Good Samaritan (Luke 10) showed his love and concern not in a worship setting but in a roadside setting.

 

A deacon should be faithful in his support of the pastor. This partnership is on full display before a watching congregation. The church will have its highest expression of worship when pastor and deacons serve God in a loving partnership.

 

In closing, everything God wants a deacon to be and everything a deacon wants to be- extends from his heart as a sincere worshipper of God. A deacon’s private worship life energizes his public worship life with a vibrant faith that overflows to the people he serves. Worship is the key to being an effective deacon.

 

Discussion Questions:

1. Share about your private time with the Lord? What does your daily devotional life look like?
2. Jesus said he is look for worshippers who will worship the Father in spirit and truth (John 4:23-24), what do you think is meant by this?
3. How does a deacon’s giving reflect his attitude toward the church he serves? Can anyone share some of the blessings you have received by giving your tithes and offerings to Christ through the His church?

If this blog post has grabbed your curiosity and you would like to know more, please pursue any/all of the below options:

1-              Contact me at pastor@missionchurchlex.org

2-              Check out our church website Misisonchurchlex.org

3-              Visit us for Community Celebration and Worship every Sunday at 9am and 11am (Facebook livestreaming available at 9am) and Mission Groups                   each Wednesday at 630pm. We are located at 3288 Beaver Creek Drive Lexington KY 40515.

4-              Follow us on Facebook www.facebook.com/missionchurch.lex

5-              Continue to read this weekly blog- “Find your Why with Pastor D”

Hello TMC Family and Friends,

During the month of July 2023 we received deacon nominations from the congregation. After the Board of Elders prayerfully and carefully evaluated the nominations, we are happy to report that we have two strong deacon candidates and one yokefellow candidate (deacon in preparation) that we believe God has provide to serve The Mission Church of Lexington! These three men are now being trained to serve in this important Biblical office. If once the deacon training is finished and the deacon candidates as well as the Board of Elders believe the Lord is still leading in this matter, these three men will be presented to the church during the “Information and Celebration Gathering” on December 3^rd for church affirmation. The newly established Board of Deacons will begin their tenure in January 2024. Over the next 6 weeks I will be sharing with you through this blog the sessions that I am using to train and equip our deacons so they can be the deacons they want to be and so they can be the deacons that TMC needs them to be! I believe the information in these sessions have spiritual and practical benefit to every Christian and every covenant church member.

 

Scenario Conversation Starter:

It is deacon nomination time again at The Church in the Mountains, and two fine men are being considered for nomination. Don has been married for 12 years, has a stellar reputation as a godly man whose wife is exemplary in every way. Carol is active in the church, teaching third grade girls, singing in the choir, and serving wherever needed. James has been married 14 years and also has a stellar reputation as a godly man with much ability and willingness to serve. However, Patty, James’ wife, is not consistent with her church attendance and doesn’t volunteer in any church sponsored ministries.  She is also known for being overly outspoken, loud, and opinionated whenever the church as a body makes decisions she doesn’t agree with. Sometimes she prefers discussing matters publicly instead of privately and other times she prefers to talk privately about people instead of going directly to them for clarification and resolution. When Patty is upset about something at church or at home, people are going to hear about it.

• If you were evaluating these two men to serve as deacon, how would the conduct of their wives’ factor into your                          decision?
• Would James’ wife’s behavior prevent him from becoming a deacon?
• How does Don’s wife’s behavior add credibility and value to him becoming a deacon?

 

I know you would agree with me that the contribution your wife makes to you and your home is priceless. And this is especially true when you are a pastor or a deacon. To say that a deacon’s wife plays a vital role in her husband’s ministry is an understatement. I’ve heard it said that no one prevents a deacon from walking with Christ, but if anyone could, it would be his wife. Yet at the same time, no one can be a greater encouragement to a deacon than his wife.

 

Proverbs 18:22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing, And obtains favor from the Lord.

 

Like it or not, when a man become a deacon, his wife is elevated to a position in the church where more is expected of her. I like to think of her influence as a fragrance of encouragement that extends from her innermost being into the life and ministry of her husband and to all with whom she comes into contact. She can bring great joy to his service and at the same time being joy to everyone around her. Let it be said that the value of a godly, supportive wife is incalculable.

Many sermons have been preached on the qualifications of a deacon, but very few on the qualifications of the deacon’s wife. Yet the Bible is not silent about this matter. Instead, it speaks clearly of her attributes, her ministry, and the home she shares together with her husband. As we explore the qualities of a deacon’s wife in this lesson, keep the following statements in mind: A deacon’s wife needs to share the same calling with her husband and a deacon’s wife needs to have the same character as her husband.

 

Let’s first look at the general qualities for all Christian wives. From this lengthy but beautiful passage of Scripture about the godly woman, we discover four general qualities of a good wife.

 

Proverbs 31:10-31 Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies.
¹¹ The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain.
¹² She does him good and not evil All the days of her life. ¹³ She seeks wool and flax,
And willingly works with her hands. ¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships, She brings her food from afar. ¹⁵ She also rises while it is yet night, And provides food for her household,
And a portion for her maidservants. ¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it; From ^[c]her profits she plants a vineyard. ¹⁷ She girds herself with strength, And strengthens her arms. ¹⁸ She perceives that her merchandise is good, And her lamp does not go out by night. ¹⁹ She stretches out her hands to the distaff, And her hand holds the spindle.
²⁰ She extends her hand to the poor, Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.
²¹ She is not afraid of snow for her household, For all her household is clothed with scarlet. ²² She makes tapestry for herself; Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
²³ Her husband is known in the gates, When he sits among the elders of the land.
²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them, And supplies sashes for the merchants.
²⁵ Strength and honor are her clothing; She shall rejoice in time to come. ²⁶ She opens her mouth with wisdom, And on her tongue is the law of kindness. ²⁷ She watches over the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness. ²⁸ Her children rise up and call her blessed; Her husband also, and he praises her: ²⁹ “Many daughters have done well, But you excel them all.” ³⁰ Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. ³¹ Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates.

 

1- The Treasures of a Good Wife (v10-12)

A good wife is a virtuous woman. The writer uses the word “virtuous” which means integrity and moral strength. A good wife is strong in all moral qualities. She is also a valuable woman to her husband and family. The word “worth” speaks of her preciousness. Ruth is the only women in the Old Testament who is called a “virtuous woman” (Ruth 3:11). Solomon would have given a king’s ransom for a woman like Ruth. The prayer of every deacon’s wife ought to be “Lord, make me a virtuous woman”.

 

To what does the Bible connect the value of a good wife? It connects her value with her love. Verse 11 contains a phrase that describes the heart of a deacon for his wife, “the heart of her husband safely trusts her.” A deacon has great confidence in serving when he can safely trust his wife. Trust is one of the most important elements in a relationship. Allow that trust to be destroyed, and you will struggle the rest of your life in your marital relationship.

 

2- The Thrust of a Good Wife (V13-22)

Note that a good wife is a hard worker (V13). The fact that she willing works implies that she is not serving her husband or her church out of forced obligation; instead, she is serving out of calling and passion. As a result, she has a busy and productive life. A deacon’s wife allows God to take the capacity she has and uses it both inside the home and outside the home. She is a completer not a competitor with her husband. She has strong ministry chemistry together.

Verses 14-22 describe the activities of the good wife, and those activities display the following qualities of her character:

• She is not lazy.
• She is health-conscious and energetic.
• She is generous.

 

Ecclesiastes 9:10 Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might.

Colossians 3:23 And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men.

 

3- The Truths of a Good Wife (V23-26)

It has been jokingly said, behind every good man you will find…. A surprised mother-in-law… lol. Behind every good man you will find an even better woman.  Verse 23 says “her husband is known in the gates”. This means a good wife has a positive influence on the effectiveness of a man to achieve and accomplish goals and responsibilities in life. Because his wife encourages his strengths, helps his weaknesses, counsels him wisely, builds up his confidence, helps mold his character, and gently ministers to him as he ministers to others.

Furthermore, a good and godly wife imparts confidence in her husband (V25-26). These verses move from what a good woman does with her hands to what is in her heart. Among her greatest assets is “wisdom”, the ability to live life skillfully. Wisdom is the right application of knowledge. Additionally, “the law of kindness is on her lips”. This means the deacons wife should have a mind full of wisdom and a mouth full of kindness. When this is the case, she will bring great benefit to her husband’s life and ministry.

 

Proverbs 1:7 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, But fools despise wisdom and instruction.

James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.

Galatians 5:22-23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ^23 [a]gentleness, self-control. 

Ephesians 4:32 And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.

 

4- The Testimony of a good wife (V27-31)

As far as her family is concerned, she is the greatest wife and mother in the world. Therefore, a good wife deserves adoration and honor. The best wife a man can have is one who loves God first of all and most of all. Because when she is accurately loving her Heavenly Father God, she can accurately love her earthly family.

Matthew 22:36-38 “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the law?” ³⁷ Jesus said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ ³⁸ This is the first and great commandment.

 

We have now looked at four general qualities for all Christian wives. Now let’s look at Four Specific Qualities of a deacon’s wife.

 

1 Timothy 3:11 Likewise, their wives must be reverent, not slanderers, temperate, faithful in all things.

 

1- A Deacon’s Wife Should Be Reverent

Placing the qualities of a deacon’s wife in the same text as the qualifications for a pastor and a deacon shows just how important her role is. The word “reverent” means that the deacon’s wife should be serious about her calling; she can help her husband to serve as deacon or she can hinder her husband from serving as deacon. A wife can either make or break any man who serves in the ministry. “Reverent” also means that the deacon’s wife demonstrates self-respect in her conduct. The Apostle Paul stated that he was careful to keep his conscience clear with God and with others so there would be no barriers to making God known.

 

Titus 2:3 The older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things.

 

2- A Deacon’s Wife Should Be Responsible

The word “devil” is translated from the same word as the word “slanderer”. This term also means “doubled tongued” and refers to one who is given to finding fault with others. This type of divisive conduct is simply irresponsible and may severely damage the unity of the church.

Remember, the deacon’s ministry began in response to a need that was causing division in Acts chapter 6. A deacon’s wife would be hypocritical to engage in conduct that creates the same problem she is responsible for preventing. Here are the three principles to help guard against being double-tongued:

1. How one discusses another person’s character disclose one’s own character.
2. An irresponsible wife easily disqualifies a potential deacon.
3. A deacon’s wife manages her opinions and her concerns responsibly.

 

Proverbs 21:23 Whoever guards his mouth and tongue Keeps his soul from troubles.

James 3:8 But no man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison.

 

3- A Deacon’s Wife Should Be Reasonable

The word “temperate” conveys the idea that the deacon’s wife must be sober in judgment and have self-control by not cheapening the ministry or the Gospel message by foolish behavior. “Temperate” also means to have a serious attitude and earnestness toward the deacon’s work. “Temperate” can also mean vigilant, an attitude which can be expressed in four ways:

1. Being practical
2. Being sensible
3. Being logical
4. Being fair in dealing with others.

 

Proverbs 28:26 He who trusts in his own heart is a fool, But whoever walks wisely will be delivered.

 

4- A Deacon’s Wife Should Be Reliable

The world “reliable” means “faithful in all things,” and can be used both in a passive sense and in an active sense. The passive sense means that others can rely on her. The active sense means that she relies on God and those He has placed in authority over her in leading the church.

Colossians 1:10 That you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God.

Hebrews 13:17 Obey those who rule over you, and be submissive, for they watch out for your souls, as those who must give account. Let them do so with joy and not with grief, for that would be unprofitable for you.

 

In closing, the wife of a deacon wants to grow in faith and be faithful in service just like her husband. There is simply no way to place a value on a wife who is a good and godly woman. She is priceless. And together with her husband, they will prove to be strong servants of the Lord by serving the local church.

 

Discussion Questions:

3- What should the relationship between a deacon and his wife look like anyway? How does the Bible describe how a husband and wife should interact with each other? What are signs of an unhealthy relationship within a deacon’s home?

 

If this blog post has grabbed your curiosity and you would like to know more, please pursue any/all of the below options:

1-              Contact me at pastor@missionchurchlex.org

2-              Check out our church website Misisonchurchlex.org

3-              Visit us for Community Celebration and Worship every Sunday at 9am and 11am (Facebook livestreaming available at 9am) and Mission Groups                    each Wednesday at 630pm. We are located at 3288 Beaver Creek Drive Lexington KY 40515.

4-              Follow us on Facebook www.facebook.com/missionchurch.lex

5-              Continue to read this weekly blog- “Find your Why with Pastor D”

Hello TMC Family and Friends,

During the month of July 2023 we received deacon nominations from the congregation. After the Board of Elders prayerfully and carefully evaluated the nominations, we are happy to report that we have two strong deacon candidates and one yokefellow candidate (deacon in preparation) that we believe God has provided to serve The Mission Church of Lexington!

These three men are now being trained to serve in this important Biblical office. If once the deacon training is finished and the deacon candidates as well as the Board of Elders believe the Lord is still leading in this matter, these three men will be presented to the church during the “Information and Celebration Gathering” on December 3^rd for church affirmation. The newly established Board of Deacons will begin their tenure in January 2024. Over the next 6 weeks I will be sharing with you through this blog the sessions that I am using to train and equip our deacons so they can be the deacons they want to be and so they can be the deacons that TMC needs them to be! I believe the information in these sessions have spiritual and practical benefit to every Christian and every covenant church member.

 

Scenario Conversation Starter:

Carlton has served as a deacon in his local church for eight years, a church where many of his friends and family members attend. Needless to say, he was excited when he was first nominated and ordained as a deacon, but in recent years some of the excitement has faded, and being a deacon has become somewhat of a chore. Lately, Carlton has experienced some business setbacks that have motivated him to look for answers that have been hard to come by. As a result of searching the Scriptures for direction and considering his position as deacon, he is coming to grips with some glaring shortcomings in his life, specifically in the areas of foul language, conduct at work, and his example at home. One day while having lunch with a business colleague who is also a deacon at the same church, Carlton shares his concerns and guilt feelings. The fellow deacon lightheartedly dismisses the matter by saying, “You know, Carlton, everyone has faults. You’re no worse than anyone else. We’re all working on something, man. If you’re asking for my advice, I’d tell you to chill out.”

If you had been Carlton, how would you have responded to your fellow deacon?

If you had been the fellow deacon confided in, how would you have responded to Carlton when he shared his concerns with you?

 

As a pastor, I can assure you that there is nothing much better than serving alongside of men called by God to serve in the Biblical servant leadership position of deacon. These men are to be qualified, willing to work together in harmony, enjoy each other’s company, and take their calling seriously. This is the partnership between pastors and deacons that we will strive to create and maintain at The Mission Church of Lexington.

 

In Ephesians chapter 4, Paul tells believers how to “walk worthy of the calling” God has placed on their life. These instructions are given to every believer in the church body; however, they apply especially to deacons.

 

Ephesians 4:1-2 I, therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you to walk worthy of the calling with which you were called, ² with all lowliness and gentleness, with longsuffering, bearing with one another in love.

 

Here we find 5 characteristics that clearly demonstrate how every deacon is to “walk worthy” of their calling:

          1- By knowing they have been called by God to serve

          2- By being faithful in their service

          3- By humbly viewing service as a privilege, not a right

          4- By exercising patience as they serve

          5- By exemplifying a forgiving spirit

 

While these 5 characteristics show all believers- including deacons- how to walk worthy of their calling, the Bible goes further by listing qualifications that apply specifically to deacons. As we will see, much focus is placed on the deacon’s character. The church, therefore, should select deacons only after carefully examining their character, conduct, and commitment to the Christ and to His Church.

 

As an apostle and a pastor, Paul was sent by God to plant churches from Judea all the way to Rome. So naturally, he had a profound love for the churches he began. When he wrote to Timothy, he did so as a loving pastor. Since Paul knew his time on this earth was drawing to a close, he was particularly concerned that the churches he had poured his heart and soul into would continue on, healthy and stable without him.

 

Paul first lists the criteria for the pastors in 1 Timothy chapter 3:1-7, then follows with a list of qualifications the church is to use for deacons.

 

1 Timothy 3:8-13 Likewise deacons must be reverent, not double-tongued, not given to much wine, not greedy for money, ⁹ holding the ^[a]mystery of the faith with a pure conscience. ¹⁰ But let these also first be tested; then let them serve as deacons, being found blameless. ¹¹ Likewise, their wives must be reverent, not ^[b]slanderers, temperate, faithful in all things. ¹² Let deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well. ¹³ For those who have served well as deacons obtain for themselves a good standing and great boldness in the faith which is in Christ Jesus.

 

Note that the qualifications Paul outlines for Deacons are purposely set against the backdrop of the qualifications for Pastors. In addition, the similarities between the qualifications of pastors and deacons underscore the awesome responsibility inherent in both Biblically mandated servant leadership positions.

 

Careful examination of the Biblical qualifications yields valuable insight about men being considered for ordination as well as deacons being reactivated for service.

 

1 Timothy 3:8 Likewise deacons must be reverent, not double-tongued, not given to much wine, not greedy for money,

Proverbs 3:3-4 Let not mercy and truth forsake you; Bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart, ⁴ And so find favor and ^[a]high esteem in the sight of God and man.

 

The Bible uses the word “reverent” in the first qualification found in the list provided by Paul in 1 Timothy chapter 3. Recalling the initial process that called into existence the prototype of what later became called the office of deacon, the qualification of having a good reputation stood as the first apostolic requirement that the early church observed when me were called and choose to serve.

Acts 6:3 Therefore, brethren, seek out from among you seven men of good reputation, full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business;

 

Proverbs 1:7 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, But fools despise wisdom and instruction.

 

1 Timothy 3:8 Likewise deacons must be reverent, not double-tongued, not given to much wine, not greedy for money,

To be “double tongued” means to twist the truth, to relay a story one way to one person and another way to another person. Men who twist the truth disqualify themselves to serve as a deacon. Deacons must not be men of doubtful words. If they are, people will not believe them or trust them- therefore they will certainly not follow their leadership. A columnist once wrote: “The naked truth is always better than the best-dressed lie”.

 

James 5:12 But above all, my brethren, do not swear, either by heaven or by earth or with any other oath. But let your “Yes” be “Yes,” and your “No,” “No,” lest you fall into judgment.

 

3- A Deacon Must Be Without Offense

1 Timothy 3:8 Likewise deacons must be reverent, not double-tongued, not given to much wine, not greedy for money,

Proverbs 20:1 Wine is a mocker, Strong drink is a brawler, And whoever is led astray by it is not wise.

Romans 14:21 It is good neither to eat meat nor drink wine nor do anything by which your brother stumbles ^[a]or is offended or is made weak.

1 Corinthians 10:23 All things are lawful ^[a]for me, but not all things are helpful; all things are lawful for me, but not all things ^[b]edify.

Ephesians 5:18 And do not be drunk with wine, in which is dissipation; but be filled with the Spirit,

 

1 Timothy 3:8 Likewise deacons must be reverent, not double-tongued, not given to much wine, not greedy for money,

The only antidote for greed (materialism) is generous giving. The best understanding of “greedy for money” is “an eagerness for dishonest gain”. It is not wrong to earn money, spend money, invest money, or save money. The danger is being so attached to money that a person is motivated to acquire it dishonestly and use it irresponsibility.

It has been said “you will never miss anything you willingly give away”. It has also been stated “we are never more like Jesus than when we give”. The Bible is clear that we cannot love God and money.

Matthew 6:21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Matthew 6:24 “No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and ^[a]mammon.

 

 

2 Corinthians 9:7 So let each one give as he purposes in his heart, not grudgingly or of ^[a]necessity; for God loves a cheerful giver.

1 Timothy 3:9 Holding the mystery of the faith with a pure conscience.

This phrase suggests having a clear understanding of basic Biblical teachings. Every deacon should have a clear understanding of orthodox doctrine such as salvation by grace through faith, the virgin birth of Christ, the resurrection, the doctrine of the church, and much more.

2 Timothy 2:15 Be diligent to present yourself approved to God, a worker who does not need to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.

Colossians 3:16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord.

If this is expected of all believers, how much more should it apply to deacons who are called to serve the church.

Psalm 119:11 Your word I have hidden in my heart, That I might not sin against You.

If God’s Word works as a deterrent in my heart keeping me from sin, then I want as much of it as I can possibly have! It has been said “the Bible will keep you from sin or sin will keep you from the Bible”. At TMC we often say, “what you do with the Bible will determine what God does with you”.

Having a strong grip on God’s Word produces two indispensable effects in deacons: They will trust in God’s promises, and they will believe in God’s power. A deacon must not only know the Word of God, but he must also do the Word of God.

James 1:22 But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.

 

1 Timothy 3:10 But let these also first be tested; then let them serve as deacons, being found blameless.

A man is not ordained as a deacon to acquire these qualifications. He is ordained because he already has them. A prospective deacon should be put to the test before he is given the trust to be a deacon.

1 Timothy 5:22 Do not lay hands on anyone hastily, nor share in other people’s sins; keep yourself pure.

To be “tested” means that his walk is to be examined for evidence of faithfulness to the responsibilities that he will be assigned as a deacon. No man should be elected to the office of deacon if he has established a pattern of unfaithfulness in areas such as church attendance, tithing, sharing his faith, prayer, and Bible study, etc. Instead, he should be proven in all these areas and many more.

Matthew 25:21 His lord said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.’

 

1 Timothy 3:10 But let these also first be tested; then let them serve as deacons, being found blameless.

The term “blameless” implies that the person has not been accurately accused. That is, there are no valid accusations being circulated that might indicate or point to problems with his character or conduct. The word “blameless” also implies a conscience that is clear of conflict between himself and others.

Acts 24:16 This being so, I myself always strive to have a conscience without offense toward God and men.

Philippians 2:14-15 Do all things without complaining and disputing, ¹⁵ that you may become blameless and harmless, children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world,

 

 

1 Timothy 3:12 Let deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well.

The “husband of one wife” is a man who is sexually pure and whose marriage commitment is to one woman only. The deacon is to be morally and sexually pure. A deacon is to be a man who has brought his sexual desires under the Lordship of Jesus Christ. A man who is not faithful to his wife should neither serve nor continue to serve as a deacon.

Matthew 19:9 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for ^[a]sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.”

Hebrews 13:4 Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.

Matthew 5:28 But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

1 Corinthians 6:18-20 Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. ¹⁹ Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? ²⁰ For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s.

1 Thessalonians 4:3 For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality;

 

1 Timothy 3:12 Let deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well.

I believe that men who are known for leading, training, and discipling their children well have an excellent background for which to serve as a deacon. The implication here is not that their children must be perfect or without struggle, but that they have been nurtured correctly, instructed Biblically, guided safely, and disciplined appropriately.

Deuteronomy 6:6-7 “And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. ⁷ You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.

Proverbs 20:7 The righteous man walks in his integrity; His children are blessed after him.

Ephesians 6:4 And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.

 

1 Timothy 3:12 Let deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well.

Since the home is the basic, God-ordained unit of society, it is in the home that a deacon develops his spiritual leadership by setting a godly example, and by encouraging, understanding, loving, and serving his wife and children. It is within the context of leading his family that a deacon will develop important skills such as conflict resolution, unity and conscious building, unconditional love, healthy confrontation and forgiveness, and sacrificial service.

Here is a simple, yet profound maxim: If you can be a good Christian at home, you can be a good Christian anywhere. It has also been said a light that shines the furthest should shine the brightest at home. Therefore, struggles in the deacon’s house will be reflected in struggles at the Lord’s house. It is crucial, therefore, that churches ordain and install only men whose homes reflect the peace and unity the church must have to flourish.

Ephesians 5:23-27 For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. ²⁴ Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. ²⁵ Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, ²⁶ that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, ²⁷ that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.

As we have seen, being a deacon is an awesome responsibility. I believe this is the reason that Apostle Paul sets the qualifications for being a deacon in the larger context of being a pastor. In a real sense, deacons are partners with and assistance to a pastor- by faithfully serving alongside him and supporting him as he leads the church.

Because a deacon serves with the pastor, he must meet the Biblical qualifications required for honorable service. His personal character, family life, and devotion to Christ come under the serious scrutiny of God’s Word. This is only right because the church, after all, is the Body of Christ. Those who serve as deacons must walk worthy of their calling.

 

1- Before beginning this training, how did you view the importance of the deacon ministry in the local church?

2- Have you ever been the recipient or a participant in a vibrant deacon ministry in another church? If so, what made that experience so effective?

3- How do you see a deacon’s ministry at home informing and impacting his ministry at church? Why does a deacon’s leadership at home and his relationship with his wife and kids matter?

 

If this blog post has grabbed your curiosity and you would like to know more please pursue any/all of the below options:

1-              Contact me at pastor@missionchurchlex.org

2-              Check out our church website Misisonchurchlex.org

3-              Visit us for Community Celebration and Worship every Sunday at 9am and 11am (Facebook livestreaming available at                   9am) and Mission Groups each Wednesday at 630pm. We are located at 3288 Beaver Creek Drive Lexington KY 40515.

4-              Follow us on Facebook www.facebook.com/missionchurch.lex

5-              Continue to read this weekly blog- “Find your Why with Pastor D”